There was once a girl who for everyday she wasn't proposed to she wrote on her calendar "NOT ENGAGED." While I haven't completely jumped over to that state of crazy I am guilty of getting close.
Hi my name is Jeanette and Evan is my boyfriend. This post is a bit of a confessional you could say. I am confessing to Losing my mind waiting for a proposal.
I've known Evan was the one for a while now even through all our ups and downs. I am not his wife or fiance but I am more than a girlfriend. We are in limbo! One day in the last six months I made up my mind that it was time for a proposal and everyday since then I have been let down. Moments ago I google searched "Losing your mind waiting for a proposal" and low and behold there was an article in the Huffington Post about this very subject that I'd like to quote. "Subtle hints led to blatant announcements and I stopped just short of begging. Who the hell was I becoming? I felt trapped, confused and manic. One day, I convinced myself I wasn't ready for wedding bells. The next, I openly and proudly told my boyfriend that I had chosen bridesmaids dresses, venues and flowers. Bless his heart, he didn't go running for the hills. It's like someone fired a starter pistol and I've been running around without a map, desperately trying to find my way to the altar. With this level of crazy, when I find the altar, I'll probably be there alone."
Yes yes yes yes yes. Exactly what she said! I've gone crazy. Hi Evan I'm sorry I love you most in the entire world. I've had some time to think and I know this but I obviously need to remind myself daily...hourly... The timing doesn't matter. I should be focusing on why I want to mary Evan and then when the ring comes it will be a symbol of all those reasons and our commitment to each other. The alternative would be a deep sigh and the word finally floating through my head. Okay that may happen but I don't want that to be all that happens. I don't anticipate the ring but everything it symbolizes. I'm excited, so crazy excited, but I won't let that turn into just plain crazy anymore. I'm not going to lie, this state of limbo is a bit like purgatory. It's hard to not know when and feel like we should be married already. But to let that take all the joy out of this time in my life is just plain silly.
I am so lucky to be Evans crazy lady. He hasn't run for the hills...yet.
